Paul or Saul?

Let me introduce everyone to a guy named Paul. For those of you who don't know who Paul is already, Christians tend to view him as the Christian of Christians. In our faith, we look to him as an example of what a Christian is. Paul is a super-Christian. He wasn't a disciple of Jesus, but instead an apostle. He wrote many, many books in the New Testament and his love for God was just massive. In short, Paul is that person we look at and say, "Man, he really has it together. I wish I could be like that."

Everyday we are confronted by people who see as this super-Christian. They look like they have this perfect life and God has just blessed them, and everything is just really going for them. I know for myself, that those people are the ones I couldn't stand. Their life was so great and God loved them so much, and here I was doing everything I was supposed to and my life was a wreck. It just didn't seem fair. Why should I have to have this crappy life and someone else get the life that I wanted and deserved? Even as Christians today, we sometimes look at Paul and think, "Why can't I be like that?" or "I'll never be good enough to like that." Sometimes I find myself being jealous and getting mad at the person Paul was because I feel like he really had it all and I just don't.

But pause. Everyone knows the saying, "don't judge a book by its cover". So we know what Paul's cover is, but read into his life. Before he was Paul, he was Saul. You know what Saul did? He killed people. Hunted them down and brutally murdered them. And Saul didn't kill just anyone, oh no, he only killed Christians. Now wait a second, am I seriously telling you that this guy who is some kinda super-Christian is the same guy who killed people for being Christians? Yes, I am.

See, that's the beauty of God's grace. When God called on Saul to his will, Saul heard it and because he chose to trade his life in for one that God would give him, God used him in incredible ways and completely changed his life. Suddenly Saul became Paul. I say this to illustrate two points: (1) God can and will use anyone for his purpose, but it is our decision to answer his call or not. No matter what we've done, God will use it for his glory, even if you've killed people. (2) No one is a super-Christian. Everyone has a past, and everyone is going through stuff. Just because we don't see it doesn't mean it isn't there. You never know what someone else is going through, and you might very well be the person who can help them. God might want to use you to help someone else that you don't even like, and it really breaks my heart to see other people suffer and if I can help just one person not feel the way I do, I would be so happy. Be aware that you're actions towards other people could be adding to their problems and causing them more hurt.

Okay, so Saul became Paul and God made him this great Christian and gave him this great life right? Nope, wrong. Paul had a pretty crappy life. He wasn't rich, he didn't have a house or family, and his friends backstabbed him and abandon him a lot. It's safe to say that Paul didn't have a perfect life. He was alone, oftentimes homeless, and betrayed. But he gets a happy ending, right? His life gets better and it all works out in the end? Well, technically he gets a happy ending. He goes to Heaven and gets eternal life. But in a stereotypical happy ending kinda way, no Paul doesn't get one at all.

Paul was imprisoned multiple times throughout his life for the sake of preaching God's word. While his death is not found in the bible, we do know that he paid the death penalty for being a servant of the Lord. We know this due to the epistles Paul wrote and historical records. At some point in time, being a Christian was unlawful and the association with Paul was a crime as well. So many people turned their backs on him, and he was made fun of and left with very few, (and by very few I mean less than 5) friends. So how did it end for Paul? He was a prisoner, ridiculed, friendless, and then murdered.

I say this to point out that it is so easy for us to look at someone and think "they're life is so perfect" or feel as if they're acting like their better than us because they're a Christian. When in reality, that's probably not the case. Not even the guy that Christians view as the greatest Christian ever had this great life or was this perfect person. I struggle with this everyday, I let my perception of someone blind me from seeing who they really are. No matter how great we think someone's life is or how perfect of a person we think we are, odds are who they are and how their life is, is just as bad as ours. Remember that you're never, ever, ever alone and there is someone who is suffering and hurting the same way you are and that someone might just be that person you don't like because you think they have a perfect life. Don't cheat yourself out of having a friend who will love you, support you, and help you through the hard times. Because in the end, that was all Paul had left aside from his love for God.